I was bit by a shark....

...in my insanely scary ass dream last night. I have been having the worst dreams for the past two months, and this is affecting my sleeping pattern. Back in college I started a string of weeks where I consistently had terrible nightmares over and over, every night. I don't know how to explain this phenomenon, but it is back and is pissing me off. I want to be having wild crazy sex dreams where I never want to wake up, but nooooooooo they have to be fucked up dreams like my house blowing up or family reunions where I'm never allowed to leave, EVER.

Last night I was having a very elaborate and realistic dream where I was water skiing at a nearby lake, which I used to do with my family back in the day. But this time, I was bit by a shark in the ankle and it hurt....bad. I woke up and my anke for real was hurting, however this is not all that weird because I took a wicked ground ball off the same ankle last week during a softball game which left it swollen and a nasty color. So my ankle was hurting while I was sleeping, so my mind decided to explain the pain to itself by creating a complex Jaws storyline, hey thanks brain, I hate you.

This is not the first time of these pain induced nightmares either. Right before I started college I was helping my dad tear down their old garage and a window broke above me and sliced the side of my leg to the bone, about 15 inches long. Pretty much the grossest looking thing ever, "so that's what the inside of my leg looks like, hello mr. tendons, hello mr. bone". After an extrutiating 6 hours in the hospital as they sewed my leg back together I went home. The first few days were fine, thanks to the codine, or something very strong like that. But, after that ran out, the pain and the nightmares started. Going from codine to Advil is like going from hitting on Jessica Biel to ending up going home with Hilary Swank.

So what is the lesson today boys and girls. Body pain apparently causes your mind to create effed up dreams to make sense to your brain. I mean when you are sleeping in your comfy bed, you shouldn't be suffering, if a part of you suddenly starts aching your brain is like WTF, so your creative mind kicks in and says don't worry brain, you're just being attacked by a shark, go back to sleep.